Wellness | Self-Compassion on Valentines day - Loving you, before looking for love

Consciously Connected Travel - CCT Journal - Self-Compassion on Valentines day | Loving you, before looking for love - women only retreat - women's healing retreats - women's wellness retreats - women's spiritual retreat

Valentine’s Day, although most of us are unsure of its origin, was built for love. From a young age, we paint this perfect picture of romance with boxes of chocolate, bouquets of flowers and giant stuffed teddy bears. We grow up thinking that our crush will surprise us with a candle-lit dinner on a boat in some beautiful city, with a live string quartet and a piece of spaghetti that’s shared beneath the stars. Everything goes perfectly, he calls the next day, you end up getting married, having children and live a happy fairytale life.

Well I don’t know about you but I have never had an experience like this. Generally, I end up buying my weight in chocolate, a store’s worth of ice cream and binge watching romantic comedies. The truth is, Valentine’s Day can actually be a sad time for a lot of us. Just as other holidays can muster a melancholy mood, the Hallmark holiday is especially guilty of this. What most people don’t consider is the fact that if you are not in a stable place in life, looking for love and forcing yourself into a relationship can be extemely harmful. That’s why this holiday we are focusing on self-compassion - loving you before looking for love.

Self-compassion can express itself in many ways and techniques of practicing it can vary person to person. I believe it is a kindness to and acceptance of oneself, an understanding and acknowledgment of one’s worth and can serve as the ultimate form of selfcare. It means we have an awareness of potential obstacles and an openness to making mistakes and learning from them. Simply said, those who practice self-compassion are comfortable in their own skin and are confident in approaching life’s chaos. They find solutions and navigate through even the most challenging situations, with the knowledge that they will get through it.

Learn to be compassionate to yourself: When we learn to be compassionate to ourselves, we open a gateway to learning and self-discovery. We can allow ourselves to be students of both life experiences and the universe.

Listen to yourself & practice what makes you happy: Are you practicing the things in life that make you happy, or are there other influences playing a part in your decision making?  Our choices should be made using meticulous love and deep consideration for oneself. At the end of the day, we only get one life to live so why approach it to fulfill the desires of others.. They will truly never have the ability to walk in your shoes so why stress on making them fit?

Your energy is what attracts others to you and you to others: Just as our energy is affected by others in our environment, our energy can be especially impactful to what surrounds us. Creating positive energy within and around yourself will in turn attract positivity to you. I like to believe that what we put out into the universe, is what we will receive. If you walk around with your head down, moping and being a martyr, you will most likely attract that type of attitude towards you. If you approach situations with a clear head, consider all possibilities, and act on knowledge rather than impulse, you will attract others who are similar to you. A deeply rooted connection to yourself can help you form meaningful and lasting relationships.

Ultimate self-love tips:

For your health:

  • Yoga

  • Meditation

  • Physical activity

  • Invest in nutrition

  • Learn how to cook

  • Invest in sleep

  • Use natural toxin-free care products and have fun exploring how to create these at home

  • Talk about your feelings

To intentionally spend your time:

  • Practice your hobbies

  • Set aside time for relaxation

  • Value alone time

  • Invest in meaningful relationships

  • Opt out of news and limit your screen time

  • Regular journaling

  • Schedule your self care practices

For self-recognition:

  • Keep a list

  • Accept self forgiveness

  • Say “no”

  • Keep track of compliments you receive and reflect on them

  • Honour your inner child and play

  • Remember that no one else can complete you or make you full


From March 23rd-31st CCT is holding a women only retreat centered around self-compassion. Our love for eco vacations and conscious tourism combines with our passion for women empowerment to create the ultimate space for self-discovery and development. Check out our upcoming retreats.